Operator Speaking

In the unlikely event of an emergency dial 9-1-1 to request assistance. Police, ambulance, and/or fire vehicles will be dispatched immediately and may arrive on the scene within the hour. The operator is primarily concerned with your well-being and will provide you with detailed first-aid instructions as needed.

Operator:
Is this an emergency?
Is anyone hurt?
Did you see who did it?
Where is he now?
What was the make and model?

Provide the operator with as much detailed information as possible to ensure the incident is properly noted - your phonecall will be recorded for use in relevant interrogations and court proceedings, if any.

Please give the operator your full, legal name if requested - when authorities arrive on the scene they will want to address you personally with further instruction or any questions which may arise.

Location:
In the tenements of eroding mortar
In the house of chipped paint
Where smoke curtains the doorway

Do not panic - remember, the operator is a professional and has experience dealing with any emergency you may be calling in regard to. Remain calm and await further instruction. Do as you are instructed.

Caller:
With your sirens blaring,
with the graveness of your calling,
with your thundering 12 gauge,
and the weight of your jurisdiction,
in your striped Ford sedan,
come to us.

Caller:
Abundant red-klaxon lights,
abundant white-sterile gauze,
abundant blue-starched uniforms,
this denouement have you brought us.

Remember:
- Do not panic
- Do only as you are instructed
- Provide any information that is requested without delay
- Await further instruction

Operator:
It is finished in beauty.
It is finished in beauty.